Sibling Bonds and Breakdowns

Valdin and Greta, siblings in their twenties, share a flat in Auckland and a deep, if sometimes fraught, bond. Both are navigating the aftermath of heartbreak and the pressures of adulthood, with Valdin reeling from a breakup with Xabi, his older ex-boyfriend, and Greta pining for her emotionally unavailable colleague, Holly. Their relationship is a mix of mutual support and gentle antagonism, each compensating for the other's weaknesses. The siblings' lives are shaped by their multicultural family—Māori, Russian, and more—and the expectations and histories that come with it. Their banter is sharp, their love fierce, and their struggles with mental health, identity, and belonging are ever-present, setting the tone for the novel's exploration of family and self.

Unrequited Loves and Lanyards

Greta's world revolves around the university, where she tutors and studies comparative literature. She is infatuated with Holly, a charismatic fellow tutor, but her feelings are unreturned, leaving Greta in a state of constant yearning and self-doubt. Holly's casual intimacy and obliviousness to Greta's feelings only deepen the ache. Greta's attempts to move on—dating men, seeking new experiences—are often comically disastrous, highlighting her inability to let go. The university setting, with its lanyards, academic hierarchies, and endless bureaucracy, becomes a backdrop for Greta's emotional turmoil and her search for validation, both romantic and intellectual.

Family Histories Unveiled

The Vladisavljevic family's history is a tapestry of migration, secrets, and survival. Valdin and Greta's father, Linsh, is a Moldovan-Russian biologist who defected from the Soviet Union as a teenager, carrying with him the scars of displacement and the burden of being different. Their mother, Betty, is Māori from Great Barrier Island, with her own legacy of colonial trauma and resilience. Family gatherings are a mix of languages, cultures, and unresolved tensions. Stories of escape, lost relatives, and the struggle to belong in New Zealand are recounted with humor and irony as coping mechanisms and pain, shaping the siblings' sense of self and their complicated relationship to home.

Heartbreaks in Wellington

Seeking to reinvent herself, Greta travels to Wellington, only to be stood up by a woman she met online. Lost and humiliated, she wanders the city's hills and forests, eventually rescued by her ex-boyfriend Matthew. Their reunion is bittersweet, filled with nostalgia and gentle teasing. Through their conversation, Greta confronts her pattern of falling for unavailable people and her fear of vulnerability. The episode is both comic and poignant, illustrating Greta's resilience and the importance of friendship in weathering romantic disappointment.

Glitter, Parties, and Letdowns

Valdin, meanwhile, seeks solace in Auckland's queer nightlife with his friend Slava. The clubs, bars, and glittery chaos offer distraction but little comfort. Conversations with Slava reveal Valdin's ongoing struggle with self-worth, his complicated feelings for Xabi, and the challenges of being queer and mixed-race in New Zealand. The night ends with Valdin reflecting on the impossibility of recapturing lost love and the necessity of moving forward, even when the future feels uncertain.

Parental Expectations and Prospects

Both siblings grapple with their parents' expectations and their own uncertain futures. Greta discusses her romantic failures and career anxieties with her mother, who offers both tough love and understanding. Valdin, feeling adrift after leaving his physics career, contemplates new possibilities and reconnects with old friends. The family's intergenerational dynamics—marked by love, disappointment, and the weight of unspoken histories—come to the fore, as each member tries to carve out a place for themselves in a rapidly changing world.

New Beginnings, Old Wounds

Greta begins a tentative new relationship with Ell, a Scottish PhD student in biology, whose practical, grounded nature contrasts with Greta's emotional volatility. Their romance is sweet but complicated by Greta's lingering feelings for Holly and her fear of intimacy. A family dinner introduces Ell to the Vladisavljevic clan, resulting in comic misunderstandings and the resurfacing of old wounds. The dinner table becomes a stage for the family's dramas, as secrets are revealed and alliances shift.

Crossroads and Confessions

Valdin's career takes an unexpected turn when he is sent to Argentina for a travel show. The trip forces him to confront his unresolved feelings for Xabi, who now lives on a ranch outside Buenos Aires. Their reunion is fraught with longing, regret, and the possibility of reconciliation. Through awkward conversations and shared memories, Valdin and Xabi navigate the complexities of love, forgiveness, and the hope of starting anew. The journey is both literal and metaphorical, marking a turning point in Valdin's life.

Tangled Roots and Reunions

Back in Auckland, the family's web of relationships grows ever more tangled. Casper, the eldest brother, struggles with parenting his teenage son Tang and balancing his own desires with familial duty. The extended family—uncles, cousins, friends—gather for celebrations and crises, each bringing their own baggage and perspectives. The novel delves into the idea of chosen family, the importance of community, and the ways in which love and loyalty can transcend blood ties.

Love, Loss, and Lemonade

As the siblings and their loved ones confront heartbreak, disappointment, and the realities of adulthood, they learn to let go of old grievances and embrace new possibilities. Greta finally stands up to Holly, asserting her worth and choosing Ell. Valdin, after much soul-searching, decides to pursue a future with Xabi, even as it means navigating the challenges of blended families and international borders. The motif of lemonade—sweet, sour, and refreshing—captures the bittersweet nature of their journeys.

Coming Home Changed

Valdin returns to Auckland transformed by his experiences abroad. The family gathers for a wedding, a celebration that serves as both a culmination and a new beginning. Old conflicts are aired and, if not resolved, at least acknowledged. The siblings reaffirm their bond, recognizing that while they cannot change the past, they can choose how to move forward together. The sense of home is redefined—not as a place, but as the people who love and accept you, flaws and all.

The Wedding and What Follows

The wedding is a joyful, chaotic affair, blending cultures, languages, and traditions. Valdin and Xabi's union is witnessed by family and friends, including Ernesto, Xabi's adopted son. The event is marked by laughter, tears, and the recognition that family is both given and made. Greta and Ell, Casper and his wife, and the rest of the clan come together in a moment of collective hope and acceptance, celebrating not just romantic love but the enduring power of connection.

Forgiveness, Futures, and Family

In the aftermath of the wedding, the characters reflect on forgiveness—of themselves and each other. Casper reconciles with his past mistakes, Greta and Valdin mend their occasional rifts, and the extended family finds new ways to support one another. The future remains uncertain, but there is a renewed sense of possibility and belonging. The novel ends with the promise of new adventures, both personal and collective, as the family continues to grow and change.

Letting Go, Holding On

The final chapters focus on the importance of letting go—of old hurts, unfulfilled dreams, and the need for control—while holding on to what truly matters: love, family, and the courage to be vulnerable. Greta and Valdin, having weathered storms both internal and external, find peace in the knowledge that they are not alone. The story closes with a sense of quiet optimism, as the siblings and their loved ones step into the next chapter of their lives, together.

The Next Chapter Begins

With the wedding behind them and new relationships solidified, the Vladisavljevic family faces the future with hope and determination. Greta and Ell plan new adventures, Valdin and Xabi navigate parenthood, and the extended family continues to evolve. The novel ends on a note of celebration and anticipation, affirming that while life is messy and unpredictable, it is also full of beauty, laughter, and the possibility of joy.

Characters

Valdin Vladisavljevic

Valdin is the heart of the novel—a tall, awkward, and deeply sensitive man in his late twenties, navigating the aftermath of a painful breakup and a career crisis. He is defined by his intense loyalty to his family, his struggles with OCD and anxiety, and his yearning for love and acceptance. Valdin's relationship with his sister Greta is central, providing both comfort and challenge. His journey is one of self-discovery, as he learns to let go of perfectionism, embrace vulnerability, and open himself to new possibilities. His reconciliation with Xabi and decision to become a parent mark his growth from wounded outsider to someone capable of building a family of his own.

Greta Vladisavljevic

Greta, Valdin's younger sister, is a sharp-tongued, emotionally volatile literature student and tutor. Her humor masks deep insecurities about her worth, her sexuality, and her future. Greta's romantic misadventures—her unrequited love for Holly, her disastrous dates, her eventual relationship with Ell—mirror her struggle to accept herself. She is fiercely loyal to her family, often acting as Valdin's confidante and protector. Greta's arc is one of self-acceptance, as she learns to assert her needs, set boundaries, and believe in her own value, both as a partner and as a member of her complex, loving family.

Xabi Alonso

Xabi is Valdin's ex-boyfriend and eventual partner, a Spanish artist living in Argentina. He is older, introspective, and marked by a history of loss and displacement. Xabi's relationship with Valdin is characterized by deep love, miscommunication, and the challenge of bridging cultural and emotional divides. His decision to adopt Ernesto, a Colombian boy, reflects his longing for connection and his capacity for care. Xabi's journey is one of healing—learning to trust, to forgive, and to build a future with Valdin despite the scars of the past.

Ell Livingstone

Ell is Greta's girlfriend, a Scottish PhD student in biology. She is calm, grounded, and unflappable, providing a stabilizing presence in Greta's tumultuous life. Ell's own struggles—with family estrangement, identity, and belonging—mirror those of the Vladisavljevic siblings, creating a bond of empathy and understanding. Her relationship with Greta is marked by patience, humor, and a willingness to weather storms together. Ell's quiet strength and resilience make her an anchor for Greta and a valued member of the extended family.

Betty (Beatrice) Vladisavljevic

Betty is the mother of Valdin, Greta, and Casper—a Māori woman from Great Barrier Island who has built a life in Auckland while carrying the weight of colonial trauma and family secrets. She is practical, loving, and fiercely protective of her children, offering guidance without judgment. Betty's marriage to Linsh is a partnership of equals, marked by mutual respect and the ability to weather adversity. Her presence is a source of stability and wisdom, grounding the family in tradition and love.

Linsh Vladisavljevic

Linsh, the family patriarch, is a Moldovan-Russian biologist who defected from the Soviet Union as a teenager. He is brilliant, eccentric, and sometimes emotionally distant, shaped by the trauma of migration and the challenge of assimilation. Linsh's love for his children is deep but often expressed through practical acts rather than words. His relationship with Betty is a testament to the power of partnership and the possibility of building a new life in a foreign land. Linsh's journey is one of reconciliation—with his past, his family, and himself.

Casper Vladisavljevic

Casper, the eldest sibling, is a visual art lecturer and father to Tang and Freya. He is the family's steady hand, often mediating conflicts and providing support. Casper's own struggles—with guilt, parenting, and the legacy of family secrets—add depth to his character. His relationship with his wife (the "other Greta") and his children is marked by love, frustration, and the desire to do better. Casper's arc is one of forgiveness—of himself and others—as he learns to accept imperfection and embrace the messiness of family life.

Tang Vladisavljevic

Tang is Casper's teenage son, navigating the challenges of adolescence, identity, and mental health. He is intelligent, sensitive, and often caught between worlds—culturally, emotionally, and within the family. Tang's coming out and his struggles with anxiety and OCD mirror those of his uncle Valdin, creating a bond of understanding and support. His journey is one of self-acceptance and the courage to seek help, offering hope for the next generation.

Slava

Slava is Valdin's Russian friend, a marketing professional with a sharp wit and a penchant for drama. He provides comic relief and a sounding board for Valdin's anxieties, while also grappling with his own issues of belonging and identity. Slava's flirtations, gossip, and loyalty make him an essential part of the siblings' chosen family, highlighting the importance of friendship in navigating life's challenges.

Ernesto

Ernesto is Xabi's adopted son, a Colombian boy who speaks little but observes much. His presence in the narrative represents hope, healing, and the possibility of building a family across borders and histories. Ernesto's relationship with Valdin and Xabi is tentative but full of promise, embodying the novel's themes of chosen family, acceptance, and the transformative power of love.

Plot Devices

Dual Narration and Shifting Perspectives

The novel employs a dual narrative structure, alternating between Valdin and Greta's first-person perspectives. This device allows readers to inhabit the distinct emotional landscapes of each sibling, revealing their vulnerabilities, desires, and misunderstandings. The shifting perspectives create dramatic irony, as each character's internal struggles are often hidden from the other, deepening the emotional resonance and complexity of their relationship. The use of humor, self-deprecation, and stream-of-consciousness narration brings immediacy and intimacy to the storytelling.

Intergenerational Trauma and Family Secrets

Family history is revealed through stories, confessions, and flashbacks, gradually uncovering the traumas and secrets that shape the present. The legacy of migration, colonialism, and loss is woven into the characters' lives, influencing their choices and relationships. The device of family gatherings—dinners, parties, weddings—serves as a crucible for these revelations, forcing characters to confront the past and negotiate their place within the family and the wider world.

Humor and Irony as Coping Mechanisms

The novel's tone is marked by sharp wit, irony, and self-aware humor, which serve both as a shield against pain and a means of connection. Characters use banter, sarcasm, and absurdity to deflect discomfort, express affection, and navigate difficult conversations. This device not only lightens the narrative but also underscores the characters' resilience and the ways in which humor can coexist with, and even enhance, emotional depth.

Queer Love and Chosen Family

Romantic and familial relationships in the novel defy traditional boundaries, reflecting the realities of queer life and multicultural identity. The device of chosen family—friends, lovers, and adopted children—expands the definition of kinship and belonging. The narrative challenges heteronormative and monocultural expectations, celebrating the messiness and beauty of love in all its forms.

Foreshadowing and Symbolism

Recurring motifs—plants, cakes, glitter, lanyards, lemons—serve as symbols of growth, transformation, and the blending of cultures. Foreshadowing is used subtly, with offhand remarks and seemingly minor events later gaining significance. The motif of missed connections—lost packages, unanswered messages, forgotten names—mirrors the characters' struggles to communicate and connect, while the eventual resolutions affirm the possibility of understanding and reconciliation.

Analysis

"Greta & Valdin" is a vibrant, deeply human novel that explores the complexities of family, love, and belonging in contemporary New Zealand. Through its dual narration and richly drawn characters, the book examines how intergenerational trauma, migration, and queerness shape the search for home and self. The Vladisavljevic family's story is both specific—rooted in the realities of Auckland, the legacy of the Soviet Union, and Māori heritage—and universal, resonating with anyone who has ever felt out of place or longed for acceptance. The novel's humor and warmth are balanced by its unflinching honesty about mental health, heartbreak, and the messiness of relationships. Ultimately, "Greta & Valdin" is a celebration of chosen family, the courage to be vulnerable, and the transformative power of love. It reminds us that while we cannot escape the past, we can choose how to carry it forward—together, with laughter, forgiveness, and hope.

Last updated: October 28, 2025