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Cruel and Beautiful

Cruel and Beautiful

by A.M. Hargrove 2015 405 pages
4.25
4.9K ratings
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Plot Summary

A Promise to Live

Drew's final wish for Cate

In the quiet, sterile hospital room, Cate faces the unimaginable: her beloved husband Drew, ravaged by cancer, asks her to promise him something she can barely comprehend. He wants her to leave, to remember him as he was, and—most of all—to live. The pain of his request is almost as sharp as the pain of losing him, but Cate, hollowed out by grief, swears she will try. Drew's love is so deep that even in his last moments, he thinks only of her future, urging her to find happiness again. This promise, made in the shadow of death, will become the anchor Cate clings to as she is forced to step into a world without him.

Fate's Cruel Reunion

Cate's accidental encounter with Andy

Two years after Drew's death, Cate's life is a patchwork of routine and numbness in a new city. On a cold, slushy DC street, fate intervenes: she slips, and a familiar hand steadies her. It's AndyDrew's old friend, now a doctor, and the man she once ran from. The shock of seeing him again is electric, stirring memories and pain she thought she'd buried. Their conversation is awkward, charged with history and longing. Andy suggests a fresh start, offering his hand and a new name, "Andy," as if they can rewrite their story. Cate, trembling with hope and fear, wonders if she can ever let herself love again.

Falling for Drew

Cate and Drew's love story begins

Years earlier, Cate is a focused, guarded college student, determined to keep her heart safe after past betrayals. Drew, older, charming, and persistent, breaks through her defenses with kindness, humor, and genuine interest. Their first date is a whirlwind of chemistry and laughter, and Cate is surprised by how easy it is to be herself with him. As their relationship deepens, Drew's unwavering support and Cate's growing trust create a love that feels both inevitable and extraordinary. Together, they dream of a future—marriage, children, a life built on mutual respect and joy.

Love and Loss

Cancer shatters their dreams

Just as Cate and Drew's life together is blossoming, Drew is diagnosed with a rare, aggressive cancer. The news is devastating, and their world narrows to hospital rooms, treatments, and the cruel ticking of time. Cate becomes Drew's anchor, caring for him through every stage of his illness, even as she struggles to hold herself together. Their love is tested by pain, fear, and the looming specter of death. Yet, in the darkest moments, they find grace—small joys, laughter, and the comfort of each other's presence. When Drew's fight ends, Cate is left adrift, her heart shattered but her promise to him echoing in her soul.

Running from Grief

Cate's struggle to survive loss

After Drew's death, Cate is a ghost in her own life, haunted by memories and unable to move forward. She leaves their home, her job, and the city that holds too much pain. Friends and family try to help, but Cate is locked in a cycle of guilt and sorrow, convinced she will never love again. Even simple tasks—selling the house, packing Drew's things—feel insurmountable. It is only through the gentle persistence of those who care for her, and the memory of Drew's wish for her happiness, that Cate begins to consider the possibility of healing.

Second Chances Begin

A friendship with Andy grows

In the midst of her grief, Cate reconnects with Andy, now a fellow doctor. Their initial meetings are tentative, marked by shared loss and mutual understanding. Andy offers Cate the gift of friendship, inviting her to run with his group and gently encouraging her to rejoin the world. Over time, their bond deepens, built on honesty, laughter, and the comfort of being with someone who understands the language of loss. Cate is wary, afraid to betray Drew's memory, but Andy's patience and kindness begin to thaw her heart.

Healing and Friendship

Cate learns to live again

With Andy's support, Cate starts to reclaim her life. She returns to work, reconnects with friends, and allows herself moments of happiness without guilt. Their friendship is a safe harbor, free from expectations, and Cate finds herself laughing, running, and even dancing again. When Andy's own relationship ends, Cate is there for him, and their connection grows more intimate. Still, Cate hesitates, unsure if she can open her heart fully. The memory of Drew's love and his final letter urging her to live become both a comfort and a challenge.

Letting Go, Moving On

Cate faces her fears of new love

As Cate and Andy's relationship deepens, Cate is forced to confront her lingering guilt and fear. She worries that loving again will mean betraying Drew, or that she will never be able to give Andy her whole heart. With the help of friends, family, and Andy's unwavering support, Cate learns that grief and love can coexist. She realizes that moving on does not mean forgetting, and that Drew's wish for her happiness is a gift, not a burden. Slowly, she allows herself to hope for a future with Andy.

Letters from the Past

Drew's letter changes everything

On the cusp of a new beginning, Cate receives a letter from Drew, delivered by his best friend Ben. In it, Drew gives his blessing for Cate to find love again, urging her to embrace life and not let guilt hold her back. The letter is both a balm and a catalyst, freeing Cate from the chains of the past. She shares the letter with Andy, who is moved by Drew's generosity and love. Together, they grieve, laugh, and honor the man who brought them together, even as they look toward the future.

Permission to Love Again

Andy seeks Drew's blessing

Before proposing to Cate, Andy visits Drew's grave, reading the letter Drew left for "The One." In it, Drew asks Andy to cherish Cate, to treat her as the rare and precious soul she is, and to never let her fly away. Andy promises to love Cate with all his heart, acknowledging the unique place Drew will always hold in her life. This act of respect and humility cements Andy's place in Cate's heart, and she realizes she is ready to say yes to a new chapter.

Building a New Life

Cate and Andy's love story unfolds

With Drew's blessing, Cate and Andy marry, surrounded by friends and family who have witnessed their journey through grief and healing. Their wedding is a celebration not only of their love, but of the enduring power of hope and second chances. Together, they build a life filled with laughter, children, and the quiet joys of everyday partnership. Cate honors Drew's memory by founding a charity in his name, turning her pain into purpose and ensuring that his legacy lives on.

Love's Enduring Echo

Drew's presence in their lives

Even as Cate and Andy's family grows, Drew's influence remains a gentle, guiding force. Cate teaches her children about the man who taught her to love deeply and live bravely. Andy, secure in Cate's love, respects the space Drew occupies in her heart. Their marriage is not a replacement for what was lost, but a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the capacity to love again. Together, they prove that life can be both cruel and beautiful, and that love, once given, never truly dies.

A New Beginning

Cate embraces happiness without guilt

Years after Drew's death, Cate stands in the home she shares with Andy and their children, finally at peace. She has learned that grief is not a betrayal of love, but a measure of its depth. By honoring Drew's memory and allowing herself to love again, Cate has found a way to carry both joy and sorrow, past and present, in her heart. Her life is not what she once imagined, but it is full, rich, and real. She is living the promise she made to Drew: to live, to love, and to never give up on happiness.

Blessings and Goodbyes

Letting go and honoring the past

On the morning of her wedding to Andy, Cate visits Drew's grave, laying flowers and reading his final letter. Andy joins her, seeking Drew's blessing and promising to care for Cate with all his heart. Together, they say goodbye—not to the love they shared with Drew, but to the pain that kept them from fully embracing the future. This act of closure allows them to step into their new life with gratitude, humility, and hope.

The Gift of Tomorrow

A family built on love and memory

Cate and Andy's marriage is marked by the presence of both joy and loss. They welcome children, celebrate milestones, and create new traditions, all while keeping Drew's memory alive. Cate's work with the foundation she created in Drew's name brings meaning to her pain, and Andy's acceptance of her past allows their love to flourish. Together, they teach their children that life is both fragile and precious, and that love, once given, is never truly lost.

Full Circle, Full Heart

Life's cruel and beautiful symmetry

As Cate and Andy watch their children play, they reflect on the journey that brought them here. The pain of loss, the struggle to heal, and the courage to love again have shaped them into people capable of deep empathy and joy. Cate knows that Drew's love made her who she is, and Andy's love has given her the strength to move forward. Their story is not one of forgetting, but of carrying the past with grace, and embracing the future with open arms. In the end, they have learned that life is both cruel and beautiful, and that love, in all its forms, is the greatest gift of all.

Characters

Cate Forbes

Resilient, loving, haunted by loss

Cate is the emotional heart of the story—a woman whose life is upended by love, loss, and the struggle to keep a promise. Initially guarded and focused, Cate's world expands when she falls for Drew, only to be shattered by his illness and death. Her journey through grief is raw and unflinching, marked by guilt, anger, and the slow, painful process of healing. Cate's relationships—with friends, family, and eventually Andy—reveal her deep capacity for love and loyalty. Her greatest challenge is learning to let go of the past without betraying it, and to allow herself the possibility of happiness again. Through her, the novel explores the complexities of mourning, the courage required to move on, and the enduring power of love.

Drew McKnight

Charismatic, selfless, and tragically fated

Drew is Cate's first great love—a doctor whose warmth, humor, and unwavering support make him irresistible. His relationship with Cate is built on mutual respect, laughter, and shared dreams. When cancer strikes, Drew's strength and selflessness shine; even as his body fails, his concern is always for Cate's future. His final wish—that Cate live and love again—becomes the guiding force of the novel. Drew's presence lingers long after his death, both as a memory and as a voice in the letters he leaves behind. He is the embodiment of love's endurance, and his influence shapes every chapter of Cate's life.

Andy (Drew) Mercer

Patient, understanding, a healer with his own wounds

Andy, also known as Drew, is a doctor who enters Cate's life at her lowest point. His own experiences with loss and his gentle persistence make him the perfect companion for Cate's journey back to life. Andy is secure enough to honor Cate's past, never threatened by her love for Drew, and wise enough to know that healing takes time. His proposal to Cate is marked by humility and respect, seeking not to replace Drew but to build something new. Andy's love is steady, nurturing, and ultimately transformative, helping Cate to believe in the possibility of happiness after heartbreak.

Ben Rhoades

Loyal friend, silent sufferer, emotional anchor

Ben is Drew's lifelong best friend and, after Drew's death, becomes Cate's confidant and support system. He is deeply affected by the loss, struggling with his own grief while trying to help Cate navigate hers. Ben's humor, honesty, and willingness to share in Cate's pain make him an essential part of her healing. His role as the "money guy" and the keeper of Drew's final letters underscores his reliability and trustworthiness. Ben's journey mirrors Cate's in many ways, as he too must learn to let go and find meaning after loss.

Jenna

Best friend, tough love, comic relief

Jenna is Cate's childhood friend and roommate, providing both practical support and emotional tough love. She is unafraid to call Cate out on her self-pity, but also fiercely protective and loyal. Jenna's humor and no-nonsense attitude help Cate through her darkest moments, and her own romantic misadventures provide a counterpoint to Cate's struggles. Jenna's presence is a reminder that friendship can be as vital as romantic love in the process of healing.

Letty and Ray McKnight

Grieving parents, sources of wisdom and comfort

Drew's parents, Letty and Ray, are portrayed with empathy and depth. Their grief is palpable, but they remain supportive of Cate, even encouraging her to find happiness after Drew's death. Their acceptance of Andy into their lives is a testament to their generosity of spirit. Letty, in particular, becomes a surrogate mother to Cate, offering guidance and understanding born of her own pain.

Mitch and Dave

Comic foils, loyal friends, voices of reason

Andy's friends, Mitch and Dave, provide both levity and perspective throughout the novel. Their banter and teasing mask deeper feelings of loyalty and concern for Andy's happiness. They are quick to challenge Cate when she falters, but also quick to embrace her when she proves her love. Their presence underscores the importance of chosen family in times of crisis.

Mandy

Work friend, mirror of Cate's struggles

Mandy is Cate's colleague and occasional confidante, navigating her own romantic entanglements and insecurities. Her relationship with Daniel, marked by miscommunication and longing, serves as a subplot that echoes Cate's journey. Mandy's struggles with vulnerability and trust highlight the universal challenges of opening one's heart after disappointment.

Daniel

Supportive coworker, unrequited love, gentle soul

Daniel is Mandy's would-be suitor, a kind and steady presence in Cate's work life. His patience and quiet affection for Mandy mirror Andy's approach to Cate, and his eventual happiness provides a hopeful counterpoint to the novel's heavier themes.

Dr. Mercer (Drew's namesake)

Symbol of hope, bridge to the future

Dr. Mercer, the oncology fellow who comforts Cate in the hospital, becomes a symbol of the possibility of healing and new beginnings. His kindness and empathy in Cate's darkest hour plant the seeds for her eventual willingness to love again. As Andy, he embodies the idea that life can offer second chances, even after unimaginable loss.

Plot Devices

Dual Timelines and Letters

Interweaving past and present, guided by memory and hope

The novel employs a dual timeline structure, moving between Cate's past with Drew and her present journey toward healing and new love. Letters from Drew serve as both a narrative device and a source of emotional resonance, providing Cate (and later Andy) with guidance, permission, and closure. This structure allows the reader to experience the full arc of Cate's grief and recovery, while also highlighting the enduring impact of love and loss.

Symbolism of Running and Movement

Physical and emotional progress, the journey of healing

Running is used as a metaphor for Cate's struggle to move forward after loss. Her initial inability to run mirrors her emotional paralysis, while her eventual return to the activity signals a readiness to rejoin the world. The motif of movement—whether through running, travel, or simply taking the next step—underscores the novel's central message: healing is a process, not a destination.

Permission and Blessing

Explicit and implicit approval to love again

Drew's final wish, expressed both in person and through letters, is for Cate to find happiness after his death. This explicit permission becomes a recurring theme, echoed by friends, family, and even Andy. The act of seeking and granting blessing—whether at Drew's grave or in conversations with loved ones—serves as a ritual of closure and a bridge to the future.

Parallel Relationships and Mirroring

Secondary characters reflect and contrast the main arc

The romantic subplots involving Mandy and Daniel, as well as the friendships with Ben, Jenna, Mitch and Dave, mirror Cate's journey. Their struggles with vulnerability, trust, and the fear of loss provide both contrast and reinforcement for the central narrative, illustrating the universality of love's challenges and rewards.

The House as a Symbol

Physical manifestation of memory and letting go

The home Cate shared with Drew becomes a symbol of both her grief and her eventual willingness to move on. Packing Drew's things, selling the house, and creating new spaces with Andy are all acts of both mourning and renewal, marking the transition from past to present.

Analysis

"Cruel and Beautiful" is a meditation on the duality of life—how love and loss, joy and pain, can coexist and shape us into more compassionate, resilient people. The novel's modern resonance lies in its unflinching portrayal of grief and the slow, nonlinear process of healing. Cate's journey is not one of forgetting, but of learning to carry her love for Drew alongside her hope for the future. The story challenges the myth of "one true love," suggesting instead that the heart is capable of loving deeply, more than once, and that moving on is not a betrayal but a fulfillment of love's promise. The use of letters, dual timelines, and a rich cast of supporting characters creates a tapestry of connection, reminding readers that we are never truly alone in our suffering or our joy. Ultimately, the novel is a testament to the power of permission—both to grieve and to love again—and to the enduring truth that life, though often cruel, is also achingly beautiful.

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Review Summary

4.25 out of 5
Average of 4.9K ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Cruel and Beautiful by A.M. Hargrove and Terri E. Laine is an emotionally devastating love story that alternates between past and present timelines. Readers follow Cate Forbes, a college student, and Drew McKnight, an oncology doctor, as they fall deeply in love. The narrative structure initially confuses readers, but most agree the payoff is worth it. The book features humor alongside heartbreak, particularly through Cate's quirky personality. Many reviewers recommend going in blind, as major twists occur around 90% through. Based on a true story, it requires tissues and leaves lasting emotional impact.

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About the Author

A.M. Hargrove is a USA Today bestselling author who made a bold career change from sales manager to romance writer. After realizing life was passing too quickly, she quit her job to pursue her lifelong dream of writing fiction. She describes herself as a "Naughty and Nice Romance Author" and embraces multiple passions including her dog Walter, dark chocolate, ice cream, vodka, and coffee. Hargrove humorously advocates for coffee and ice cream to be recognized as official food groups. She actively connects with readers through various social media platforms and maintains a newsletter for her growing fanbase.

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