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Filthy English

Filthy English

by Ilsa Madden-Mills 2016 312 pages
4.11
13.3K ratings
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Plot Summary

Masquerade Night Meltdown

Remi's honeymoon becomes heartbreak

Remi, jilted by her fiancé Hartford just before their wedding, finds herself in a London nightclub on what should have been her honeymoon. Surrounded by masked strangers, she's adrift, her pain masked by tequila and the encouragement of her best friend, Lulu. The club's anonymity and wild energy only amplify her sense of loss and displacement. As she tries to drown her sorrows, Remi's vulnerability is palpable—her plans for a perfect life shattered, her self-worth in question. The night is a swirl of regret, anger, and the desperate hope for distraction, setting the stage for a fateful encounter that will force her to confront the past she's tried so hard to bury.

A Chance Encounter Rekindled

Fate reunites Remi and Dax

In the haze of the club, Remi's clumsy fall lands her in the lap of a strikingly familiar stranger—Dax Blay, the British bad boy from her past. Their chemistry is instant and electric, reigniting memories of a passionate, ill-fated weekend years before. Both are stunned by the coincidence, their banter laced with unresolved hurt and attraction. Dax, cocky yet wounded, is equally thrown by Remi's presence. The encounter is charged with possibility and danger, as old wounds threaten to reopen. The universe, it seems, is conspiring to force them together, challenging their carefully constructed defenses and setting off a chain of events neither can control.

Past Lovers, Present Tension

Old flames, new complications arise

Remi and Dax's reunion is anything but smooth. Their shared history—three days of intense connection followed by heartbreak—hangs between them. Both are quick to trade barbs, masking vulnerability with sarcasm. Dax's cousin Spider's wager that Dax can win Remi's heart adds a layer of manipulation, while Remi's recent breakup and Dax's own family pressures complicate matters. The club's anonymity strips away their usual roles, exposing raw emotion. As they spar, the line between anger and desire blurs, and the possibility of a second chance flickers, even as pride and pain threaten to keep them apart.

The Bet and the Kiss

A wager sparks dangerous intimacy

Spider's bet pushes Dax to pursue Remi, but the game quickly becomes real. Their first kiss is explosive, reigniting the passion they once shared and leaving both shaken. The mask of casual flirtation slips, revealing longing and regret. Remi, desperate for control, tries to keep things light, but the intensity of their connection is undeniable. Dax, haunted by what he lost, is torn between self-protection and the urge to claim her. The kiss is both a promise and a warning: their story is far from over, and the stakes are higher than ever.

Unmasking Old Wounds

Painful truths surface between them

The aftermath of their kiss brings buried pain to the surface. Remi's anger at Dax for their past, and Dax's frustration at her avoidance, erupt in a heated confrontation. They trade accusations about betrayal, misunderstandings, and the fallout from their brief affair. The club's chaos fades as they are consumed by their own storm. Both are forced to admit that their feelings never truly faded, and that the wounds they inflicted on each other still ache. The night ends with more questions than answers, but the possibility of healing—if they dare to face the truth.

Rescue and Revelation

Danger brings them closer

A violent attack outside the club shatters the fragile truce between Remi and Dax. When Remi is assaulted and robbed, Dax's protective instincts override his anger. He fights off her attacker, risking his own safety. In the aftermath, Remi's vulnerability is laid bare, and Dax's tenderness surprises them both. The trauma strips away pretense, forcing them to confront their feelings. Remi's gratitude and Dax's guilt create a new intimacy, as they care for each other's wounds—physical and emotional. The night's violence becomes a catalyst for honesty, and the first step toward forgiveness.

The Bracelet and the Attack

Loss and comfort intertwine

Remi's stolen bracelet, a cherished gift from her late father, becomes a symbol of everything she's lost. Dax's determination to recover it mirrors his desire to make amends for the past. As they process the attack, their defenses crumble. Remi confides in Dax about her fears and disappointments, while Dax reveals the pain of his mother's death and his struggles with commitment. Their shared grief creates a fragile bond, and for the first time, they see each other not as adversaries, but as fellow survivors. The bracelet's absence is keenly felt, but the comfort they find in each other offers hope.

Aftermath and Confessions

Secrets and scars are revealed

In the quiet after the storm, Remi and Dax open up about their deepest wounds. Remi shares the story of her father's death and the pressure to be perfect, while Dax confesses his fear of abandonment and the impact of his mother's loss. Their honesty is raw and unfiltered, breaking down years of mistrust. The conversation is a turning point, as they realize that their pain is not unique—and that healing is possible. The night ends with a tentative agreement to try friendship, but the undercurrent of desire remains, threatening to upend their fragile peace.

Friendship Pact, Shaky Ground

A contract can't contain desire

Determined to avoid repeating past mistakes, Remi and Dax draft a "no kissing" friendship contract. The gesture is both earnest and absurd, a desperate attempt to impose order on chaos. They try to navigate the boundaries of platonic intimacy, but their chemistry simmers beneath the surface. Living in close quarters, every glance and touch is charged. The contract becomes a symbol of their struggle for control, even as fate—and their own hearts—conspire to break the rules. The tension builds, making it clear that friendship may not be enough.

Tangled Hearts in London

Desire and denial reach a breaking point

As their London adventure continues, Remi and Dax are drawn together by shared experiences and mutual longing. They dance around their feelings, each afraid to risk more pain. A night of drinking and confessions leads to a passionate encounter, blurring the line between friends and lovers. The aftermath is messy—guilt, confusion, and the resurfacing of old insecurities. When Hartford unexpectedly arrives, Remi is forced to choose between the safety of her past and the uncertainty of her future. The love triangle intensifies, and the cost of indecision becomes painfully clear.

Homecoming and Heartbreak

Returning home, old patterns persist

Back at Whitman University, Remi and Dax's fragile connection is tested by reality. Remi, still reeling from Hartford's betrayal, tries to rebuild her life. Dax, haunted by what might have been, throws himself into new responsibilities. Circumstances force them to become roommates, reigniting old tensions. The proximity is both a blessing and a curse, as unresolved feelings simmer. Jealousy, misunderstandings, and the interference of friends and rivals threaten to derail any hope of reconciliation. The past looms large, and both must decide if they are willing to fight for a future together.

Roommates and Rivals

Living together, hearts on edge

Sharing a house, Remi and Dax struggle to maintain boundaries. Their daily interactions are fraught with longing and frustration, as each tries to move on. Hartford's presence complicates matters, fueling Dax's jealousy and Remi's confusion. The house becomes a battleground, with every shared meal and late-night conversation charged with unspoken emotion. Attempts at friendship falter, and the risk of heartbreak grows. As secrets come to light, the fragile peace between them shatters, forcing both to confront what they truly want.

Living with Ghosts

The past refuses to stay buried

Haunted by memories of their lost weekend and the pain that followed, Remi and Dax are unable to escape the ghosts of their past. A chance encounter with an old rival reveals a devastating secret: Remi's miscarriage after their first affair. The revelation rocks Dax, filling him with guilt and regret. Remi, forced to relive her trauma, is both relieved and terrified to finally share her burden. The truth brings them closer, but also threatens to destroy the fragile trust they've built. Both must decide if they can forgive—not just each other, but themselves.

The Truth About the Past

Confessions lead to catharsis

In a raw, emotional confrontation, Remi and Dax lay bare their deepest fears and regrets. Remi confesses the pain of her miscarriage and the loneliness that followed, while Dax admits his terror of loving and losing. Their honesty is both devastating and liberating, breaking the cycle of avoidance that has kept them apart. The moment is a crucible, burning away pretense and leaving only the possibility of healing. For the first time, they see each other as flawed, wounded, and worthy of love. The path to forgiveness is uncertain, but the first steps are taken.

Love, Loss, and Letting Go

Letting go to move forward

Despite their newfound honesty, Remi and Dax struggle to move forward. Old habits die hard, and the fear of repeating past mistakes looms large. Remi, determined to reclaim her independence, moves out, leaving Dax to confront his own emptiness. Both are forced to reckon with what they truly want—and what they are willing to risk. The pain of separation is acute, but necessary. In the crucible of loneliness, they discover that love is not about possession, but about the courage to let go and trust in the possibility of a new beginning.

The Final Goodbye

A last stand at the bonfire

At a fraternity bonfire, Remi makes a bold, public declaration of her feelings, challenging Dax to do the same. Surrounded by friends and rivals, they lay their hearts bare, confessing love in front of everyone. The moment is cathartic, burning away the last remnants of pride and fear. Their reunion is passionate and unapologetic, a testament to the power of vulnerability. The bonfire becomes a symbol of redemption, as they choose each other—fully, finally, and without reservation.

Bonfire of Redemption

Passion and forgiveness ignite

In the aftermath of their public reconciliation, Remi and Dax retreat to a private sanctuary, where they consummate their love with abandon. The physical union is both a celebration and a healing, fusing their bodies and souls. The scars of the past are acknowledged, but no longer define them. In each other's arms, they find acceptance, forgiveness, and the promise of a future. The bonfire's glow lingers, illuminating a path forward—one built on honesty, trust, and the hard-won knowledge that love is worth fighting for.

Forever, Finally Found

A year later, love endures

One year on, Remi and Dax return to London, stronger and more in love than ever. Their journey has been marked by pain and loss, but also by growth and joy. Surrounded by friends and family, they celebrate not just survival, but triumph. The masquerade is over; their masks are gone. In each other, they have found home, healing, and a love that endures. The story ends not with a fairy tale, but with the hard-earned happiness of two people who chose each other—again and again, forever.

Characters

Remi Montague

Wounded planner seeking control

Remi is a tall, intelligent, and fiercely independent woman whose life is upended when her fiancé leaves her just before their wedding. Driven by a need for order and security—shaped by her father's death and the responsibility of caring for her autistic brother—Remi clings to plans and lists as a way to manage her anxiety. Her past with Dax Blay, a passionate but disastrous affair, left her deeply scarred, both emotionally and physically (through a miscarriage she kept secret). Remi's journey is one of learning to let go of control, confront her trauma, and risk vulnerability. Her relationship with Dax is both her greatest temptation and her path to healing, forcing her to reconcile her desire for safety with her need for true, messy love.

Dax Blay

Charismatic bad boy with hidden wounds

Dax is the quintessential British heartthrob—handsome, cocky, and seemingly carefree. Beneath the bravado, however, lies a man haunted by loss: his mother's early death, a distant father, and the fear of loving and losing again. Dax uses humor, charm, and casual sex to keep people at arm's length, but Remi is the exception who gets under his skin. His journey is one of confronting his own vulnerability, accepting responsibility for past mistakes, and learning that real strength lies in honesty and commitment. Dax's evolution from playboy to devoted partner is marked by setbacks and self-doubt, but ultimately, he chooses love over fear.

Hartford Wilcox

Safe, dependable, but emotionally distant

Hartford is Remi's ex-fiancé, the "perfect" man on paper—responsible, kind, and stable. His inability to handle emotional complexity leads him to abandon Remi, only to regret it later. Hartford represents the allure of safety and predictability, but also the limitations of a relationship built on convenience rather than passion. His presence in the story forces Remi to confront what she truly wants, and his eventual acceptance of their breakup is both painful and necessary for her growth.

Lulu

Loyal, vivacious best friend

Lulu is Remi's confidante and emotional anchor, providing comic relief and unwavering support. With her bold style and fearless attitude, Lulu encourages Remi to take risks and embrace her desires. She is the voice of reason and rebellion, challenging Remi's need for control and reminding her that life is meant to be lived, not just planned. Lulu's own subplot with Spider adds depth and humor, highlighting the importance of chosen family.

Spider

Troubled cousin, catalyst for change

Spider, Dax's blue-haired, tattooed cousin, is both a source of chaos and unexpected wisdom. His struggles with addiction and self-destruction mirror Dax's own fears, and his wager sets the main plot in motion. Despite his flaws, Spider's loyalty and insight help Dax confront his feelings for Remi. His journey toward recovery and self-acceptance parallels the main characters' arcs, underscoring the theme of redemption.

Malcolm

Innocent observer, grounding force

Remi's autistic younger brother, Malcolm, provides a lens of honesty and simplicity. His straightforward observations cut through the drama, reminding the characters—and readers—of what truly matters. Malcolm's presence grounds Remi, giving her purpose and perspective beyond her romantic entanglements. His acceptance of Dax is a subtle but powerful endorsement of their relationship.

Declan Blay

Protective twin, mirror of Dax's struggles

Dax's twin brother, Declan, is a stabilizing influence, embodying the path not taken. More responsible and grounded, Declan's own romantic journey (detailed in a companion novel) serves as a foil to Dax's chaos. His support and occasional tough love help Dax navigate his emotional minefield, while his relationship with Elizabeth offers a parallel narrative of healing and hope.

Elizabeth

Survivor, symbol of resilience

Elizabeth, a secondary character and protagonist of a companion novel, is a survivor of trauma who finds strength in vulnerability. Her friendship with Remi and connection to Declan add layers to the story, illustrating the ripple effects of pain and the possibility of new beginnings. Elizabeth's journey mirrors Remi's, reinforcing the novel's themes of forgiveness and self-acceptance.

Eva-Maria

Antagonist, embodiment of cruelty

Eva-Maria, the jealous sorority girl who tormented Remi after her affair with Dax, represents the destructive power of gossip and insecurity. Her actions have lasting consequences, fueling Remi's shame and isolation. Eva-Maria's eventual apology is a small but significant step toward closure, highlighting the possibility of growth even for those who cause harm.

Alexandria

Rival, catalyst for jealousy

Alexandria, one of Dax's many admirers, serves as a foil to Remi—petite, blonde, and seemingly carefree. Her flirtation with Dax stokes Remi's insecurities and forces her to confront her true feelings. Alexandria's presence is a reminder that love is a choice, not a default, and that true connection cannot be faked or replaced.

Plot Devices

Dual Narration and Alternating Perspectives

Shifting viewpoints deepen emotional resonance

The novel employs alternating first-person perspectives, primarily from Remi and Dax, to immerse readers in their internal struggles. This structure allows for a nuanced exploration of misunderstandings, secrets, and the slow unraveling of emotional armor. By giving voice to both protagonists, the story captures the push-pull of attraction and fear, making their eventual union feel earned and authentic.

The Masquerade and Anonymity

Masks symbolize hidden truths and vulnerability

The opening masquerade party is both literal and metaphorical, setting the tone for a story about unmasking and self-discovery. The anonymity of the club allows Remi and Dax to interact without the baggage of their past, but also forces them to confront the parts of themselves they hide from the world. The motif recurs throughout the novel, culminating in the final chapter where masks are shed and true selves are revealed.

The Lost Bracelet

A symbol of loss, memory, and hope

Remi's diamond bracelet, a gift from her late father, serves as a tangible link to her past and a metaphor for everything she's lost. Its theft and eventual recovery mirror her journey from grief to healing. Dax's efforts to retrieve it are both an act of love and a form of atonement, underscoring the theme that true connection requires sacrifice and vulnerability.

The Friendship Contract

A futile attempt at control

The "no kissing" contract is a humorous yet poignant device, highlighting the characters' desperate need for boundaries in the face of overwhelming attraction. Its inevitable failure illustrates the futility of trying to legislate emotion, and the necessity of embracing uncertainty. The contract's destruction marks a turning point, as Remi and Dax finally surrender to their feelings.

The Bet

Games mask deeper fears and desires

Spider's wager that Dax can win Remi's heart is the catalyst for their renewed relationship, but also a commentary on the ways people use games to avoid vulnerability. The bet's evolution from a joke to a genuine test of character forces Dax to confront his true motivations. Its resolution—Dax choosing love over pride—signals his growth and the end of his emotional isolation.

Trauma and Healing

Shared pain as a path to intimacy

Both Remi and Dax are shaped by loss—her miscarriage and father's death, his mother's passing and fear of abandonment. The novel uses their trauma not as mere backstory, but as an active force driving their choices and interactions. Their willingness to share and witness each other's pain becomes the foundation for real intimacy, transforming suffering into strength.

Public Confession and Redemption

Love declared, pride surrendered

The climactic bonfire scene employs the classic device of public confession, forcing the characters to risk humiliation for the sake of honesty. By declaring their love in front of friends and rivals, Remi and Dax reclaim their narrative and reject the shame that has haunted them. The moment is both cathartic and redemptive, signaling the end of secrecy and the beginning of a shared future.

Analysis

Modern romance, trauma, and the courage to love

Filthy English is more than a steamy second-chance romance; it's a meditation on the messy, nonlinear process of healing and the courage required to love after loss. Through Remi and Dax, the novel explores how trauma shapes identity, the allure and danger of control, and the necessity of vulnerability. The story subverts the "bad boy/good girl" trope by giving both protagonists depth and agency, refusing to reduce their pain to mere plot points. The use of humor, banter, and self-aware plot devices (like the friendship contract and the bet) adds levity without undermining the gravity of their struggles. Ultimately, the novel argues that true love is not about perfection or safety, but about choosing each other—again and again—despite fear. The happy ending is hard-won, a testament to the power of forgiveness, self-acceptance, and the willingness to risk everything for a chance at real connection.

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Review Summary

4.11 out of 5
Average of 13.3K ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Filthy English follows Remi and Dax's second-chance romance after reconnecting at a London masquerade party. Readers praised the intense chemistry, emotional depth, and angst between characters who shared a passionate three-day encounter years earlier. The British bad-boy hero and Romeo and Juliet influences resonated with most reviewers. While many loved the steamy scenes and character development, some found the back-and-forth frustrating and the ex-fiancé subplot excessive. The dual POV and writing quality received consistent praise, with most rating it 4-5 stars despite occasional pacing concerns.

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About the Author

Ilsa Madden-Mills is a #1 bestselling author across Amazon Charts, Wall Street Journal, New York Times, and USA Today, specializing in angsty new adult and contemporary romance. A former high school English teacher and librarian, she loves Pride and Prejudice and considers Mr. Darcy her ultimate hero. She's known for creating complex, emotionally charged stories with strong chemistry and second-chance themes. Her recent works include Dear Ava, Not My Romeo, I Promise You, and Not My Match. She maintains active engagement with readers through her newsletter, social media platforms, and private Facebook group called Unicorn Girls.

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